If the interior of a plane is япония порнография инцестhell, the middle seat of a three-person row is the Devil's HQ. You're squished on both sides, you're particularly vulnerable to chatty neighbors, and you have easy access to neither the bathroom nor the window. It's only fair that you be allowed to use two armrests.
For years (years!), people have been arguing about who can rightfully claim the two armrests on either side of the middle seat. In our opinion, there's a clear answer here, but we'll lay out the debate anyway.
To illustrate both perspectives, let's say three people are sitting in a row on the right side of a plane. According to one school of thought, each person should use the armrest to their left, and the person in the window seat will get one extra armrest next to the wall. According to the other, correct perspective, the people in the aisle and window seats should use the armrests to their left and right, respectively, and the person in the middle should get both middle armrests. (Perhaps you have seen the Jim Jefferies clip on the subject.)
The reason we have chosen to get mad about this again is a Twitter poll from sports journalist Rich Eisen. As you might expect, the poll asks whether the person sitting in the middle seat gets both armrests. Of course they do -- we've just explained why. However, the poll's results were a disturbing 47% "definitely" and 53% "no way" with over 102,000 votes at the time of writing. What -- and we can't stress this enough -- the hell?
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We aren't saying that giving the middle seat person two armrests will make their experience good. Flying is never going to be good. But we must give the middle seat passenger somesmall comfort as they scrunch up their legs and inhale various lunchtime burps. The other two seats have their little perks: The aisle seat has a little extra legroom and easy bathroom access, so you can pee without saying "excuse me" and inconveniencing someone else. The window seat has the window, plus a disgusting wall to rest your head on if you want to take a tragic nap. Let's give the middle seat something to talk about, too.
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Of course, there is a way to avoid the harrowing middle seat experience: Never sit in the middle seat again. But sometimes it can't be helped, particularly if you book a basic economy flight and don't get to choose your seat ahead of time. And if you find yourself in the aisle or by the window, please be kind to the beleaguered middle seater beside you. They are so miserable. You are, too. The air is just so dry.
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